Desire and Duty Read online




  EVERNIGHT PUBLISHING ®

  www.evernightpublishing.com

  Copyright© 2016 Marie Medina

  ISBN: 978-1-77233-953-6

  Cover Artist: Sour Cherry Designs

  Editor: Karyn White

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

  WARNING: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. No part of this book may be used or reproduced electronically or in print without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews.

  This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, and places are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  DEDICATION

  To all the readers who’ve asked for MF stories set in Valladora. More to come soon!

  DESIRE AND DUTY

  Valladora Tales, 1

  Marie Medina

  Copyright © 2016

  Chapter One

  Valladora

  3155, The Year of Suns

  Gwynn sat by Vane’s bedside with an open book in her hand. She kept turning pages pointedly, but she wasn’t reading a word. She was trying not to strangle the vampire in the bed beside her. She’d been walking down the hall when Vane’s mother had come careening around a corner and nearly sent them both tumbling. She’d sent Gwynn to sit with Vane without explaining what was going on. Gwynn had hiked up her skirts and bolted to the chamber, knowing something had to be wrong if Lady Evane was dashing around as if her skirts were on fire.

  And then she’d learned the truth. Vane had been hiding a key fact that could help save his life, and she’d had to dig her nails into her palms to keep from strangling him when he told her. Vane had the Dissolution, the only disease a vampire could get, and the illness almost always proved fatal unless the vampire could drink from its fated mate. Vane had insisted on being stubborn when his family began making plans to find his mate. Vane and Arion, apparently, had fallen out with each other twenty years ago, and Arion had left. Gwynn hadn’t been born at the time, so she’d only pieced the story together through what others had told her over the last few days. But according to everyone, it had been tragic and heartbreaking on both sides, and Vane had never tried to seek his mate out and reconcile with him.

  She shifted in her seat, glaring over at Vane. If he wanted to be that way, it was his business for the most part, but it was a completely different thing when it could kill him. He’d hidden the fact that Arion was a lycan, knowing full well that telling his family that vital detail would make it so much easier to track the man down. Unless Arion returned and gave his blood to Vane, the vampire would probably die. Only a small percent of vampires recovered from the Dissolution on their own.

  Vane sighed and met her glare with a pleading glance. “Just smother me. We’ll all be happier. You’re so angry the castle might spontaneously combust any moment.”

  “Glad you’re feeling well enough to make jokes,” Gwynn said sharply before tossing the book onto the bed. “What bloody right do you have to hinder others from helping you? If you’d just told everyone right away that Arion was a lycan, they could’ve written to Sigmund. You’ve cost them days, and we don’t even know how many fucking days you have.”

  Vane swallowed and fidgeted with his blankets a little. “I can’t do anything but apologize. I know you don’t want to hear excuses—”

  “You’ve got that right!” she said, cutting him off. She sat back in the chair and crossed her arms to keep her hands still. She wanted to give him a good shake.

  After taking a couple of deep breaths, he said, “But I truly would rather die than see him again. It’ll hurt too much. Why can’t I make anyone understand that? I was in love with him, but he never loved me. I ruined things just as he was warming to me. He’s built a life for himself, and I don’t want to intrude on that.” He sighed. “You know the story? Everyone’s been whispering the last couple of days, I know.”

  “Aye, I’ve got the gist of it. A girl was raped, and she accused him. You locked him up, and then it turned out it was actually one of the bandits he’d saved you from. He was hurt and left.” The stories she’d heard had contained more details, but angry as she was, she didn’t want to cause Vane more pain.

  Vane’s eyes glazed over a bit. “Yes. He was so angry and hurt. I broke his heart, too, in a different way. He said he could never love someone who had so little faith in him. He said if I truly loved him I would leave him in peace and never try to find him. I made a promise, and I’m angry you’ve all made me break it.”

  He didn’t look very angry, and she almost wished for a show of temper, as she knew his seemingly calm demeanor only proved how weak he was. “Well, you can be as angry as you like. We don’t care. You really expect me to believe Arion will refuse to come? He could hate you to this day for all I know, but I can’t imagine anyone just letting another person die for spite. Or pride. Or other such nonsense.”

  Vane’s voice cracked a bit as he said, “But if he comes and saves me, watching him leave a second time will just break my heart all over again. I won’t want to live.”

  “Quit feeling sorry for yourself.” Gwynn stood up and climbed onto the bed, folding her legs under her so she could sit right next to Vane in the middle of the large bed. “Think of your parents. And Ash and Byron. The rest of your family. Me and everyone else in your dominion.”

  Vane stared down at his hands and didn’t say anything.

  Grunting in frustration, Gwynn leaned over him and got right in his face. “Look me in the eye and tell me you won’t feel bad about me crying my eyes out at your funeral. You tell me that, and I’ll pack my bags right now.”

  Vane did look her in the eye, but he didn’t say anything. Some tears glistened there, and then he turned his head away. Gwynn lay down beside him and put one arm around him. “See? Can’t say it, can you? You’re just hurt and acting out like a child.”

  “That is not what I’m doing. My pain’s real.”

  Gwynn sighed. “I know it is, but you have so many people who love you. If you get hurt again, they’ll all be here for you. And so will I.”

  Vane shifted in her embrace. “Gwynn, I’m not sure this is appropriate. Someone might come in.”

  Gwynn laughed. “If anyone thinks I want to fuck you, they’re crazy.”

  “Thanks. That’s cheered me up,” Vane said, his tone flat.

  Gwynn sat up and put her hands on her hips. “You’re in no state to be amorous. Plus, you’re like an older brother or something. And there’s the fact you aren’t the type to seduce the help.”

  “I know. I just thought Orman might come up or something.” He cleared his throat. “I wouldn’t want to make him jealous or give him the wrong impression.”

  Gwynn hesitated. Why was everyone carrying on about that all of a sudden? Had Orman said something to Vane or one of his brothers? Even Ash’s mate had said something about it. Orman liked her because she wasn’t lazy. She got things done, and she did them right the first time. What steward wouldn’t favor a servant like her? She got the job done and didn’t let anyone or anything intimidate her. “He’d know better than anyone that I’m not interested in you. And why is everyone insisting that he’s got some kind of thing for me?”

  “Because he is interested in you. Very.”

  “And he’s said this outright?”

  Vane shook his head. “No, but it’s pretty obvious.”

  “And I’m just stupid? Is that what you’re saying?”

  “No one’s saying anything like that, but it happens all the time. One person usually takes an interest first, and then the other person notices. Or the first person acts on it. Eventually. Since, as you just said, everyone is insisting
it’s true, why are you so skeptical?”

  Because it’s crazy! She ignored the voice in her head and gave a more rational reply. “Because I think you’re all making assumptions and seeing something that isn’t there.”

  “Or you aren’t attracted to him and don’t want it to be true.”

  “You’re fishing.”

  “I’m what?”

  “Trying to get me to say whether I think he’s attractive or not.” She got off the bed. “I never figured you for a matchmaker. I’m disappointed.”

  Vane narrowed his eyes. “Why? If all of you are allowed to poke your noses into my business, why can’t I say what I think? Orman likes you. He’s too serious and works too much. Makes him a great steward, sure, but he’s unhappy.” Vane lay back, sighing and looking more drained now. “He smiles around you. His sense of humor comes out more. He’s just plain happier when you’re in the room.”

  “He appreciates my work ethic, and—”

  The door opened, and Gwynn shut her mouth as she turned to see Orman rushing into the room. He looked angry as he strode toward them with purpose.

  ****

  Orman came to a halt by the bed and took a deep breath to collect his thoughts. He’d had some choice words for the lord, but he didn’t want to let them fly in front of Gwynn. He folded his hands in front of him and tried to speak calmly. “I’ve spent days writing to people, and you knew all along whom I should be writing to. I’d like an explanation.”

  Gwynn took up a book that had been lying haphazardly on the bed, and she carried it over to the bookshelf. She glanced back at them as she slid it into place. “I can wait outside, if you’d like some privacy.”

  Orman never wanted to ask Gwynn to leave any room he was in, but he planned on getting some answers out of Vane. “I may be a while.” He reached into his pocket. “But if you could take these letters to my study. Open the one with the blue seal and see what it says. It should be about the linens you said we needed to replace. See what the merchant says, and then we can make a decision later.”

  She took the letters from him, her fingers brushing his as she did so. She seemed to be watching him very carefully. “All right. I hope he quotes a better price than the last one.” She glanced at the letters and then eyed him once more before nodding to Vane. “You behave. You’ve done enough damage already.” She turned on her heels and left without looking back.

  Orman looked at Vane. “Perhaps I should’ve left you with her. She’d probably get more answers than I would.”

  “I can’t do anything more than say I’m sorry. You’ve all found out the truth anyway, so why keep talking about it?”

  Orman sat in the chair by Vane’s bedside. They’d only discovered that Vane’s mate was a lycan because the vampire talked in his sleep, and it infuriated Orman that Vane had hidden such information. “Because you could die. Are you in shock or what? How do you not see how serious this is?”

  “How do all of you not see how serious my pain is? Why aren’t any of you respecting my wishes?”

  “Your wish is to die without trying to get better. I know I’ve never met your mate, but what man would let another die because of a fight that happened twenty years ago?”

  “That’s just it. He’ll come. And then he’ll leave again.” Vane closed his eyes. “I don’t want to keep talking about it.”

  Orman bit his tongue and eventually said the most diplomatic thing he could think of. “You’ll thank us when this is over. You’ll see.”

  Vane opened his eyes. “Don’t you have your own love life to straighten out?”

  “Don’t change the subject.”

  “I could say the same to you. I feel we’ve closed the last subject. On to a new one.” Vane turned to his side and propped on one elbow. “Now answer my question.”

  Orman stood and took up a bottle of blood from the table. While the blood wasn’t Vane’s mate’s and wouldn’t heal him, it would at least give Vane some strength. “Drink. You can’t even sit up.”

  Vane sat up but took the bottle anyway. “I can sit up. I simply chose not to. Stop evading me.”

  “I don’t have a love life at all,” Orman said as he flopped back into the chair. He folded his hands in his lap. “There’s nothing to straighten out.”

  “Nothing to straighten out? Hmmm, if you say so.” Vane uncorked the bottle and drank about a third of it. A bit of color returned to his face, and he leaned back. “Gwynn was studying you very carefully just now. I thought perhaps she was finally returning your feelings.”

  “I don’t think a girl like Gwynn will ever return my—” He stopped and looked up at the grinning vampire, realizing he’d been tricked. “I’m too old for her.”

  Vane laughed. “You’re talking to a vampire. Age doesn’t mean a damned thing.” He recorked the bottle and nestled it down amid some pillows. Crossing his arms, he said, “She’s nineteen. And you’re thirty-two. I don’t see the problem.”

  “I’m thirty-one, actually.”

  Vane smiled. “Even better.” Sobering, he said, “Tell me what the problem is. The worst she can do is reject you.”

  “Not to be rude, but you’re one to talk, my lord. Look what being rejected has done to you.”

  Vane’s eyes went wide. “You’re forgetting who the lord of this land is, I think. That was more than a bit rude, so you’re going to have to be punished for that.”

  Orman waited as Vane narrowed his eyes and then stared out the window.

  “Hmmm,” Vane said. “I think I know just the thing. Oh yes, just the thing.” A chuckle bubbled up as he looked back at Orman.

  Orman didn’t know what to do as Vane stared at him with an odd look in his eyes, a slight smile curving his lips. Some vampires suffered mental breakdowns during the Dissolution. What would they do if Vane began to go mad? At least his mother was here and could remove him from power if necessary, but it would have a devastating effect on everyone in the dominion. Vane was loved almost universally. Orman felt his chest tighten as he thought about how hard it would be to have to fight against Vane or lock him up.

  Vane linked his hands behind his head and leaned back on the headboard, wiggling a bit to ease himself back on the pillows. “I command you to have dinner with Gwynn tonight. You’re both exhausted and need a break. Some time for yourselves.”

  Orman exhaled the breath he’d been holding. “By the gods, you scared me.”

  Vane’s brows came together as he lowered his arms to his sides again. “What are you talking about?”

  “I thought you were actually going to punish me simply for hitting a nerve with what I said. Then you laughed and looked at me with that grin on your face. I thought you were…” He trailed off, suddenly realizing how this misunderstanding might offend Vane.

  Vane tilted his head. “You thought I was losing it? What did you expect me to do? Tie you up and have you whipped?”

  “I’m sorry. I’ve just been so worried.” He exhaled loudly. “Don’t you see how anxious and scared we are?”

  “Yes,” Vane said very softly.

  “Then try to be understanding with us.”

  “How about you try to understand my position? I’m used to being able to fix everything. Now everyone I love is in distress, and it’s my fault.”

  “It’s not your fault you got sick. That’s silly.”

  “I’m not used to being powerless.”

  “Then let Arion help you when they bring him back. Once you have your strength back, let the pieces fall where they must and then deal with it. Handle it. I think you can do it.” He stood up. “I believe you could do anything, honestly. I half believe you could heal yourself through sheer determination.” He laughed without humor. “But I’m still going to do all I can to help you.”

  “I’ll feel better if you do as I commanded.”

  “So that’s not a joke?” Orman asked, having hoped maybe Vane would’ve forgotten.

  “No, it’s no joke. My mother can stay with me.” He sighe
d and slid back under the covers. “She’ll be back any moment, I’m sure.” His gaze slid to Orman. “I think you better do as I say, or I might tell her how you feel about Gwynn. She’d be thrilled to help. She’s always liked you, and she loves Gwynn.”

  Orman felt a chill go up his spine as he remembered some of the stories he’d heard. “I’ll do as you ask. Just don’t do that. All right? We have a deal?”

  Vane laughed. “Yes, we do.” He held up both hands demonstratively. “See? The entertainment has restored my spirits.”

  Orman opened his mouth to speak, but Lady Evane came in just then. Orman bowed and said, “I’ll do just as you say, my lord.” He turned and bowed to Evane. “My lady.”

  “Orman,” Evane said, bowing her head and then going back to her son’s side.

  Orman made a hasty retreat, Evane’s voice already echoing through the room as she fussed over and reprimanded her son in turns. He made his way to his study, wondering exactly what he was going to say to Gwynn. It would be far easier to say that Vane had ordered them to relax and take some time for themselves, but it wasn’t exactly romantic. It also wasn’t true. Lying to her seemed as unnerving as actually asking her to spend the evening with him. But one way or another, he’d have to act.

  If Lady Evane found out he was in love with Gwynn, the castle truly would be in a state of chaos.

  ****

  Gwynn really liked the terms the merchant offered, and his price was reasonable. She sat at Orman’s desk and drafted a reply, as she felt Orman would agree with her. Her handwriting wasn’t very feminine, so Orman often sent off letters she’d drafted with his signature affixed. It saved all of them time. She set the draft in the middle of the desk pad and patted it with a sheet of blotting paper. She tossed the used sheet into the little basket by the desk and stood up, surveying the mess on the polished surface. She put the unopened letters in the wooden box on the corner and began sorting things out. Vane’s illness had Orman worried and flustered, so his study was even messier than usual.